One week left.

Can it be that we're really down to just a few days until the end of the Bush presidency? I can hardly believe it. The past eight years have been so hard for advocates of women's health, for those who work against poverty or for access to quality health care? Do I dare let myself get a little excited? The past few years have been bad news followed by worse. I'm wondering when we'll actually start to see some positive changes in the lives of the women we serve. I'm thinking of one mother I talked to today, in particular.

DaShay called up and asked for Plan B for her daughter Alia. I told her that it was actually available over the counter at any drugstore, usually for about $30-50.  She said that she didn't have the money to get it and thought that her insurance would pay for it if I sent in a prescription. She was pretty angry, cursing her daughter up and down for having sex. She asked me how Plan B worked. "When did your daughter have intercourse?" I asked. "Oh, she's about three weeks," DaShay said.

"Three weeks since the sex or do you mean that she's three weeks pregnant?"

"She's only three weeks pregnant." I explained to her that Plan B can prevent pregnancy if used within 5 days of unprotected sex by preventing ovulation, but that it would not have any effect if her daughter was already pregnant.

I told her that if her daughter did not want be pregnant, then she could end the pregnancy by having a surgical or a medically-induced abortion (by using the abortion pill--not plan B.) I asked her to put Alia on the phone and we realized that she was actually nearly 9 weeks pregnant and would be too far to do a medication abortion by the time she came in. Alia answered my questions slowly, but kept confirming that she did not want to be pregnant. Even though she was 17, she sounded younger. Mom was in the background shouting lots of questions, so I asked to speak to DaShay again.

"Look--my daughter has one baby and I got her baby. I adopted him because she can't care for him. She's got a disability, she can't care for herself, she can't learn, she was in special classes but went and dropped out. I been laid off. We only get a little bit of money for her disability. She can't have another baby! We are on welfare--do you hear me? WEL...FARE. WELFARE! Understand? We got nothing. Now what's this gonna cost? Thirty? Fifty dollars for the pills?"

Because of where she lived, DaShay's welfare would not cover the cost of an abortion. "Actually, it's going to be closer to $350," I explained again why it was different than needing Plan B. She started screaming at her daughter, "$350? What am I supposed to do! Where we gonna get money? Where'd that little boy go who said he's gonna help you?" 

When DaShay calmed down again, we went over her finances. She was right--they were just barely surviving. I don't know how she was making it work. We went through the steps to get her some emergency help from the National Abortion Foundation, but still weren't able to get the whole cost covered. We made a plan where she would try to come up with a portion and I would start calling around to some other emergency abortion funds to find part of it. We scheduled Alia's appointment for two weeks in the future, to give each of us a chance to try to come up with some more money. I'm still waiting for phone calls back from the emergency funds and I don't know what's going to happen.

All I know is I can't wait for a day when our national health care policy and our leadership can find a solution so that no woman's unplanned pregnancy creates this kind of crisis. After eight years of the Bush Presidency can you even imagine a world where women and mothers get their basic medical needs met? One week to go until a leadership change. Godspeed, President Obama! 

-Nell

1/13/08--I am going to add a postscript to this entry, because several readers have been distressed at the possibility that Alia may have been sexually abused or that she did not have the intellectual capacity to understand what was happening for her. I'm glad that our readers are concerned for her welfare. No woman should be forced or coerced into having an abortion, continuing a pregnancy or giving a child up for adoption. It is very important that women with special needs get extra time and care to ensure that they make decisions that they are comfortable with. For an example of how a counselor can work with a minor to ensure that she is not being abused, that she understands the medical care she will recieve and that her medical team and family come together to help support her, please see this entry that Lou wrote a few weeks ago.

Comments

[Sharon M.]

Why don't you forced birthers stay off our prochoice sites? Don't you have some children to adapt? Oh wait.. Piss off

[Jessica G.]

Obviously all varying sides of this never-ending debate feel passionately that their side is the respectful, loving, supportive one, and feel that the other 'side' is imposing, judgemental, and oppressive in some ways.

I don't want to get into that, but just to ask what I always wonder: What is wrong with adoption in this specific instance? The author herself states that she did not offer this option.

[SIMZ]

I'm surprised the clinic couldn't offer to donate this woman's abortion. I know that in our area, we have no problem refunding the money women pay at the abortion clinic if they decide on a different choice and don't keep their appointment. We can even follow up by providing everything else the woman needs to follow through with her choice. As a matter of fact, we can even follow up with everything she needs when she goes through with what you guys call choice. Who profits from that? What was being said about something not being about money? Hmmmm............. The biggest question is if someone on here (that is not pro-life, or "small-minded" as it was put) will admit that providing a woman with parenting classes, diapers, clothing, rides to appointments, medical care, counseling (before and post-abortion), and friendship would classify as "helping people like this." Let's be fair.

[TheRealistMom]

This situation made me tear up. As a woman who thankfully had the choice to not continue a pregnancy at a young age, with the support of my mother beside me at the doctor, and as a mother of a special needs child. I've had to place my daughter on BCP not only to regulate her cycles to make it easier for her to learn female hygiene, but just in case some (insert expletive here) takes advantage of the giving and compliant nature of a young woman with Down syndrome. Thank you to those who have the means to assist.

[SoMG]

If you're sending money to pro-choice organizations, don't forget MEDICAL STUDENTS FOR CHOICE.

By giving to them, you maximize the pro-choice bang for your charity buck.

[SoMG]

The important thing to remember about CPCs is that because they don't collect a fee or operate under licence, they have ZERO LEGAL OBLIGATION to tell the truth, and to consider the patient's health.

If a doctor shows you a fake ultrasound, or lies to you, in order to advance his/her political/religious agenda, that's malpractice. You can sue, get his/her licence yanked, maybe even send the doc to jail. If a CPC does the same, you can do ... NOTHING. The First Amendment protects their right to say ANYTHING THEY WANT, true, false, or stupid.

[roula]

And Diatryma, if I recall correctly it varies by state who is a mandated reporter and what the state considers reportable. Someone with national-level knowledge might be a better resource for that question though.

[roula]

Hahahaha - refer someone to a CPC for personalized support! that's funny, Christina. They don't "take time" to do anything except their pre-scripted persuasion tactics, regardless of the situation a woman is going through. If you think a CPC would somehow support this young woman through a very difficult pregnancy and motherhood, let alone through a choice they *didn't* sanction, you may not have actually spent time in a CPC.

Everyone - please also consider donating to the national or local branches of the National Network of Abortion Funds: www.nnaf.org . They are volunteer-run and so far this year have been quite low on funds, because of the combined difficulties of this particular economic/unemployment/housing situation and also the hardships that winter can bring even in the best of years. It is hitting both potential donors and women in crisis quite badly.

[Diatryma]

Ted's question does bring up something interesting: are abortion clinics considered mandatory reporters? My impression was yes, but I have no information to base it on.

[Morgaine]

Christina, because CPC is actually going to do something about it? They won't.

And, abortion clinics are not in it for the money. That is a anti-choice myth.

Ugh. People like you and the few people who commented before you make me cringe with your extremely small minded grasp of what is reality. You have no clue what it is like for these people and to make judgments on what little you have read here IS very small minded. If you (all of you) are so worried about the "killing" what are you doing to help people like this? How many children (special needs) have you adopted? How many pregnant teenagers have you mentored, helped out (and not just by talking them out of having an abortion, I mean really supported them throughout their pregnancy and the parenting/relinquishment that followed?)?? How many woman's hands have you held while they were making what could possibly be the hardest, yet best decision they have ever made in their lives? I am betting none. You just like to come on here and say nasty things about some really good people who are doing the best they can without making moral judgments on people. That, to you, is the extent of your "pro-women" anti-choice bullcrap.

[Christina]

This family has a LOT of problems that aren't going to be fixed by killing this girl's baby. What good will it do to kill the baby then send the girl back to her overstressed mother who is already decompensating?

Why not just refer this family to a CPC that will take the time to actually address their needs?

Other than that there's no money in it for you, that is?

[Ted]

So you're interested in killing the baby at all costs? Isn't there something illegal about covering up sexual abuse, statutory rape, possibly even felony rape of a mentally challenged person?

[D.]

I would like to know the cost this abortion so that I can give double the cost to a pro-life organization so that children will not be killed in the future. I will pray for you.

[Morgaine]

I would like to help too. I can't pay for it all, but I can definitely afford to send some money to help this family out. God, I can't even imagine.

[AidelMaidel]

Nell, please email me where I could send some money to help. I don't have much but I want to send something.

[Susan Hines]

I can help too if you tell me where to send the funds

[Shelly Kang]

Nell, e-mail me and let me know where I can send a check. I can't pay for the whole thing, but I think I can probably help cover the difference. I can do Paypal too if that's easier.