The media so rarely get it the way you want it, but here is an author that is comfortable with complexity and nuance. Monika Bauerlein writes in MORE magazine about trying to hear real people's experiences in a political context that doesn't always allow a fuller discourse. She interviewed two abortion providers and some prochoice folks too.
Even better were three companion first person articles about changing from a black and white world view (prochoice) to a gray but still prochoice view. One was a woman who has repeated IVF procedures and felt surprisingly proprietary about her 8 celled "children." Another was a male abortion counselor who shifted his rhetoric after he saw his own baby's ultrasound. And the third, and my favorite, was a woman with a teen who was appalled that her daughter watched her friends blithely have children and not know they had a choice. This middle aged dyed in the wool prochoice activist had to "come out" to her daughter about her own abortion and her beliefs about women's lives.
A good read: In the stores now, with Sigourney Weaver on the cover, or on line. Here is a link to the article from More magazine.
http://ww5.more.com/more/story.jsp?storyid=/templatedata/more/story/data/1158939433681.xml
--bon
Have you seen ( HOT OFF THE SHOW! Throw-away babies )
It's a blog by Sharon Hughes?
Posted by: I'll be frank | Wednesday, October 18, 2006 at 08:08 PM
World estimations of the number of terminations carried out each year is somewhere between 20 and 88 million.
3,500 per day / 1.3 million per year in America alone.
50% of that 1.3 million claimed failed birth control was to blame.
A further 48% had failed to use any birth control at all.
And 2% had medical reasons.
That means a stagering 98% may have been avoided had an effective birth control been used.
Bill Clinton once said that abortions should be available , safe and RARE. He is a very wise man.
I'd like to see an ultrasound in every clinnic to provide a more informed choice before going through with something they may regret.
I'd also like to see birth control made available to all who can't afford it.
Posted by: Nobodyinparticular | Saturday, October 14, 2006 at 11:03 PM
Found the article. Wow, I can really see a commonality with your stance and with what the woman in this article reported others are trying to convey. This issue really hits me hard since I had "fetal demise" at 16 weeks, and 5 days later ended up having a D&E. I thought about it at the time, realizing it was the very same surgery some women have to end the life of their babies on purpose. Everything was the same (I was not awake). I was not in a clinic, though, and was in a hospital. Nurses were nice enough, but no one talked with me about it that day. My ob tried to talk with me before, mostly about the clinical aspect. She noted that I was sad after the fact at the follow up appointment and offered pills for my mood. However, I felt that I needed to grieve. I had to seek out my own sense of comfort. Even though the procedure didn't kill my baby, I mourned the loss of having the body, of the birth experience of that baby. I wish I had requested to labor and deliver so I could have seen the body. I wish I had found out where the baby was going to end up so I could have had the body to bury myself. I actually asked and my ob wouldn't tell me about the procedure and wouldn't tell me where the body goes. A nurse at the hospital also refused to tell me what happens to the remains. This was, and is still difficult for me.
I am not prochoice in any sense of the word. I recently had some friends terminate their much wanted baby due to poor prognosis of the pregnancy. This baby wouldn't have made it much longer, so they aborted. I did not agree with their decision. Still, I do feel much compassion for them and for others who have a chosen abortion/termination. I know the anxiety before surgery, I know the feelings after the surgery. I know the drama of having a life inside and then suddenly, not having a life inside. My friends are definitely prolife, and this was the hardest decision they have had to make. I kept my mouth shut and let them be...I only let them know I care for them and mourn the loss of their precious baby. I didn't agree, but I didn't have to punish them. I still love them and always will. I am sad they didn't let life take it's course to death and they hurried the process. I mourn.
Reading the article did make me sad, just as reading this blog makes me sad. I read about women who do the same as I did, leaving letters for their babies. I am sad they didn't have room in their lives for their children (most aren't doing this because their baby isn't going to survive...), that they recognize that they chose to stop the life, and yet they mourn. It's almost as if they are saying, "oops, I made a mistake, sorry" and that makes it okay. Really, nothing can make it okay when a baby dies. My baby died inside me for no known reason, I wanted my baby, and it was not okay he died. Other babies die inside a mother because of a procedure (or a pill, or some other intervention). This doesn't make it okay. I don't think me yelling at the world will do anything to stop abortions. I just want to let the world know, I love the babies that were lost, I love the women who chose to abort. I wish it were all different and that the babies would be allowed to continue their lives. I don't like it one bit. For the women, for the babies...I mourn.
Posted by: DawnML | Wednesday, October 11, 2006 at 11:59 AM
I cannot get the link to go....
Posted by: DawnML | Wednesday, October 11, 2006 at 09:04 AM